Since I had a breakdown and was hospitalised three years ago, I've been in supported housing, on the bidding/waiting list for a council flat. Pixie has been living with my folks and their dog, Jack. I spend the odd week or so there, then come back to my place, where I'm not allowed to have pets. Since it's been three years with no joy in finding somewhere, I've been preparing to move into my parents house. Not ideal, since it's a small room and a house with four adults, but I'm currently caught in the benefits trap, where if I return to work, then rent in supported living is £400 per week - far more than I'd be earning. But, I'd get to be with Pixie full time. So I've just decorated their spare room, sold some furniture of mine, and on Wednesday a friend helped me move a load of my stuff to their house.
On Thursday, I was offered a council place.
![Shocked :shock:](./images/smilies/icon_eek.gif)
I get to see it this Thursday, and decide then. It sounds good, very very reasonable rent for my city (Bristol), however, it's in a deprived area right on the outskirts of the city, and a very long way away from my folks. I won't be in a position to afford a car any time soon, so relying on public transport. It's a first floor place with my own garden (I'm not sure how that works, but I can update after Thursday). My hope was to find somewhere not too far from my folks house, for two reasons. 1. They are getting on and my mum is disabled; it's helpful if I can nip in to help them out with things, especially since they're caring for three of my animals and that's added to their workload. and 2. I'd hoped to return to work now that I'd have an affordable rent, then drop Pixie off at theirs for doggy daycare while I'm at work. She's used to always having someone around, or at least Jack around while they nip out shopping etc. My line of work tends to involve 14 hour shifts and the odd sleep in duty, so no way would I leave her for that long either. I'm not confident about leaving her alone for a shorter shift even, we'd have to build up to being left for a few hours.
But being this far out, we're looking at a two hour bus ride to take her from the new place to my folks, let alone picking her up again, and this just isn't workable as something to do before a shift.
However, if I find night shift work, that might be much more reasonable to leave her with folks for a few nights, then have her with me for a few days at a time. Or, if on dayshifts, Pixie stay with folks for the weekdays I'm working, and come stay with me on my days off? But is that unfair to Pixie to ask her to go back and forth and essentially live at two different places? I don't want to be selfish about this.
Another alternative is for Pixie to remain with my folks full time, and for me to go and stay with them on my days off. This is way more simple, and means I could help them out with things when I'm off of work. However, I don't want to run myself into the ground again when trying to take on too much at once contributed to my breakdown.
I realise their are a lot of unknown variables about this, since I haven't even found work yet. I just wondered what you guys think? Anyone have to do something like this themselves before?
Just extra info that might be relevant - Pixie has always lived at my folks house since she was 8 weeks old, she gets along great with everybody, but I'm her favourite person in the world and the one she's most likely to listen to. Both dogs have adjusted very well to me coming and coming for days or weeks at a time. They go mad with excitement and are glued to me when I get there, then calm down a bit, although Pixie will nearly always choose to hang out with me. Pixie and Jack get along well for the most part, but do compete with each other (with Pixie winning usually) and aren't pair-bonded in that way that some dogs are that shouldn't be separated. We think they'd both be fine without living together all the time.
I think if any dog could cope with the confusion of "sometimes you live here with me, sometimes you stay at mum and dads", it would be Pixie. She's very even tempered and adjusts well to most things. The fact she copes well with me coming and going without showing separation anxiety or anything like that gives me hope it could work. But I figured it was worth starting a thread to explain the circumstances, get some feedback, and keep people updated as this goes on.